smoking suxxx; biscuit

so here's the deal...i've said before that i'm not feeling real red, white and blue that i've started smoking cigarettes again. i hate feeling like shit all the time, i realize that the anxiety i feel in some situations (like, um, conference calls) is more a function of my butt-hunger than any real stress i associate with what's going on outside of me, i don't enjoy the fact that smoking has enabled me to start the day with the same symphony of gacking/gagging noises that usedta amuse me so much when my old man was making 'em when i was a kid. the kicker, though, is this: since i got married back in march, i reallyreallyreally donwanna croak earlier than i need to and leave my sweetie alone and sad. (she's way too realistic of a person to try to browbeat/nag/guilt me out of this, but it's a definite consideration.) so, i've gotta find a way to shake this jones. i dig my life way too much to give it up because of my own stoopid compulsions.

separate but related topic: apparently, the death of randy "biscuit" turner, graphic artist and ex-front for legendary texas skate punks the big boys, was due to complications from hepatitis-c. if anyone you love is using i.v. drugs, slap the shit out of them.