"it's official, but not authorized"
my dutch punk-rock pal tony slug (in texas next weekend for gigs in austin and houston with shit city high) unloads with both barrels on the indie record biz:
What's worse than being a talented and awesome rock guy who sits in a van 10 hrs a day year after year to get ripped off by clubs and promotors all over the Western world? That's right, straight up. Being a talented and awesome rock guy who sits in a van 10 hrs a day year after year all over the world for THREE DECADES, comes home stonebroke, doesn't have daddy's trust fund waiting on him, and gets ripped off by the twisted freaks who run record labels!
Ever heard of a little thing called sharing, Mr. independent label owner? I guess not since an elite 5% of your lame asses own 97% of the wealth.
Now I'm not a lawyer, I'm a musician, and labels know that. How do these teflon-coated turds ever find the time to keep their books and send their bands a symbolic token of appreciation, inbetween all these projects and attending POPCOMM and all those other dicksucking conventions when we're out there doing the field work in the most adverse possible conditions ? These high-profile criminals are too busy marketing Punk rock to a generation of idiots with no clue or taste I suppose.
If you run a record label you should be executed in the ass, erm, gas chamber. That's right, go fuck yourself, honcho. Fuck yourself in the ass with a haram GLAZED HAM. You suck!
Sluggy is about to spend the next ten minutes in a full fledged attempt to make you look like thieving bastards, which most of you are!
Now y'all know Sluggy tells it like it is. So here's JUST A SMALL cut section, cream of the creeps who ripped us off.
GLITTERHOUSE RECORDS - released 4 records, never heard of since. So, just wondering: WHO IS THIS PUBLISHING COMPANY that apparently owns my titles that I never signed with? Adding insult to injury, German fart-throbs DIE ARZTE stole my kick-ass title "Rocknroll Ubermensch" and used it as their own for an album, selling half a million copies of it. Goddamn if that doesn't hurt like a bitch.
R RADICAL RECORDS - MDC's label, yeah I know, we should have known. Saint of the "we do it for the kids, maaan" squatters Dave MDC is a millionaire, did you know that? No shit freaks. He owns 4 houses. Irony at its very best.
GET HIP RECORDS - at least we got an advance from these guys which covered about a 5th of the studio time and related expenses. As soon as they had the masters all communication with us stopped. they did hower licence one track to TIPI records, who in turn put my song on the Interwebs to download at 80 cents a download. Sluggy mourns a thousand bitter tears for any pathetic soul which downloads this festering boil on my asshole of an MP3. I woulda given it to you for free. That's right, (If you just shit your pants, you ought to consult your proctologist. We also didn't even get a copy of this comp thanks to that fat fuck from ELECTRIC FRANKENSTEIN, talk about a band who get way too much airtime.
FREAKSHOW RECORDS - another the uber-skank shitlord enterpreneur from Italy. Same M.O. Took the money and went AWOL, no royalties, no mechanicals. In true "Indie" fashion, this poopstain didn't pay anything, did however went out of his way to license the vinyl release to CARGO GERMANY, who didn't even inform us about it. Much less did we get half of the license fee as stipulated in the "contract".
CARGO GERMANY - It's official, but it's unauthorized...
Yeah, just like your latex Hulk Hogan "king of the ring" dildo.
Same deal (pun intended): No mechanicals, no credits on the sleeve, no royalties, no nothing. We could BUY our own record to have some shit to sell on tour though! YAY! How very generous.
I could mention 10 more from the top of my hydrocephalic head.
Ahhh yes... Sure, you remember the good old days when Grandpa Slug would open up a bag of Werther's Original Candies, release a record, sell it at shows for cost price and not feel guilty about it. That was classic old school shit! But after 40 bootlegs, some of which find better distribution worldwide than legit releases, and countless rip-off scenarios, such as the abovementioned, there will be no more of that. Uh-uh.
It's like my good friend Happy-Tom said, "the time of punk rock gentleman handshake deals is over."
So bon't blame us musicians. And you know, accusing someone of being a "sell out!" is SO 1985. Especially if it's me, who has been fucked without a kiss more often than a boatload of Thai hookers on Chinese New Year. Who played a THOUSAND benefits for any "noble cause" imaginable, from "Save the Welsh miners" to "pay the squathouse electricity bill because we spent all our money on dope". Don't get me talking.
YOU are the ones selling out. Independent labels operate just like major labels except they don't pay the bands. Don't blame me bitch. Blame your independent record peddling colleagues.
Somebody should give po Sluggy a 500 page major label contract, and I'll be glad to sell out. Only this time there WILL be a lawyer present. First, I'm off to Tex-ASS this monday. And making an album with Tony Visconti (Bowie, T Rex etc) in New York in December
Oh Japan calls! Kick ass.
Sluggy will ROCK FOR RAMEN SOUP.
Sayonara.
PS - When I get back to Olympia, - tis part of my transformation to boner fide REDNECK, I will grow a beard, and go Ted Nugent (Yes you can call me "the Ted Nugent of punk") prancing through the woods not in a loincloth, but in my denim Turbojugend jacket. Armed with a high powered ruger boomstick. I pity the wildlife that comes in my sight. Click-clack BOOM! Wish you were a label owner, Mr. Grizzly bear. Then again, a man's gotta eat, and I'm WELL PREPARED to kill what I eat.
FTW & peace through superior firepower.
-Tony
What's worse than being a talented and awesome rock guy who sits in a van 10 hrs a day year after year to get ripped off by clubs and promotors all over the Western world? That's right, straight up. Being a talented and awesome rock guy who sits in a van 10 hrs a day year after year all over the world for THREE DECADES, comes home stonebroke, doesn't have daddy's trust fund waiting on him, and gets ripped off by the twisted freaks who run record labels!
Ever heard of a little thing called sharing, Mr. independent label owner? I guess not since an elite 5% of your lame asses own 97% of the wealth.
Now I'm not a lawyer, I'm a musician, and labels know that. How do these teflon-coated turds ever find the time to keep their books and send their bands a symbolic token of appreciation, inbetween all these projects and attending POPCOMM and all those other dicksucking conventions when we're out there doing the field work in the most adverse possible conditions ? These high-profile criminals are too busy marketing Punk rock to a generation of idiots with no clue or taste I suppose.
If you run a record label you should be executed in the ass, erm, gas chamber. That's right, go fuck yourself, honcho. Fuck yourself in the ass with a haram GLAZED HAM. You suck!
Sluggy is about to spend the next ten minutes in a full fledged attempt to make you look like thieving bastards, which most of you are!
Now y'all know Sluggy tells it like it is. So here's JUST A SMALL cut section, cream of the creeps who ripped us off.
GLITTERHOUSE RECORDS - released 4 records, never heard of since. So, just wondering: WHO IS THIS PUBLISHING COMPANY that apparently owns my titles that I never signed with? Adding insult to injury, German fart-throbs DIE ARZTE stole my kick-ass title "Rocknroll Ubermensch" and used it as their own for an album, selling half a million copies of it. Goddamn if that doesn't hurt like a bitch.
R RADICAL RECORDS - MDC's label, yeah I know, we should have known. Saint of the "we do it for the kids, maaan" squatters Dave MDC is a millionaire, did you know that? No shit freaks. He owns 4 houses. Irony at its very best.
GET HIP RECORDS - at least we got an advance from these guys which covered about a 5th of the studio time and related expenses. As soon as they had the masters all communication with us stopped. they did hower licence one track to TIPI records, who in turn put my song on the Interwebs to download at 80 cents a download. Sluggy mourns a thousand bitter tears for any pathetic soul which downloads this festering boil on my asshole of an MP3. I woulda given it to you for free. That's right, (If you just shit your pants, you ought to consult your proctologist. We also didn't even get a copy of this comp thanks to that fat fuck from ELECTRIC FRANKENSTEIN, talk about a band who get way too much airtime.
FREAKSHOW RECORDS - another the uber-skank shitlord enterpreneur from Italy. Same M.O. Took the money and went AWOL, no royalties, no mechanicals. In true "Indie" fashion, this poopstain didn't pay anything, did however went out of his way to license the vinyl release to CARGO GERMANY, who didn't even inform us about it. Much less did we get half of the license fee as stipulated in the "contract".
CARGO GERMANY - It's official, but it's unauthorized...
Yeah, just like your latex Hulk Hogan "king of the ring" dildo.
Same deal (pun intended): No mechanicals, no credits on the sleeve, no royalties, no nothing. We could BUY our own record to have some shit to sell on tour though! YAY! How very generous.
I could mention 10 more from the top of my hydrocephalic head.
Ahhh yes... Sure, you remember the good old days when Grandpa Slug would open up a bag of Werther's Original Candies, release a record, sell it at shows for cost price and not feel guilty about it. That was classic old school shit! But after 40 bootlegs, some of which find better distribution worldwide than legit releases, and countless rip-off scenarios, such as the abovementioned, there will be no more of that. Uh-uh.
It's like my good friend Happy-Tom said, "the time of punk rock gentleman handshake deals is over."
So bon't blame us musicians. And you know, accusing someone of being a "sell out!" is SO 1985. Especially if it's me, who has been fucked without a kiss more often than a boatload of Thai hookers on Chinese New Year. Who played a THOUSAND benefits for any "noble cause" imaginable, from "Save the Welsh miners" to "pay the squathouse electricity bill because we spent all our money on dope". Don't get me talking.
YOU are the ones selling out. Independent labels operate just like major labels except they don't pay the bands. Don't blame me bitch. Blame your independent record peddling colleagues.
Somebody should give po Sluggy a 500 page major label contract, and I'll be glad to sell out. Only this time there WILL be a lawyer present. First, I'm off to Tex-ASS this monday. And making an album with Tony Visconti (Bowie, T Rex etc) in New York in December
Oh Japan calls! Kick ass.
Sluggy will ROCK FOR RAMEN SOUP.
Sayonara.
PS - When I get back to Olympia, - tis part of my transformation to boner fide REDNECK, I will grow a beard, and go Ted Nugent (Yes you can call me "the Ted Nugent of punk") prancing through the woods not in a loincloth, but in my denim Turbojugend jacket. Armed with a high powered ruger boomstick. I pity the wildlife that comes in my sight. Click-clack BOOM! Wish you were a label owner, Mr. Grizzly bear. Then again, a man's gotta eat, and I'm WELL PREPARED to kill what I eat.
FTW & peace through superior firepower.
-Tony
posted by stashdauber at 7:05 AM
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